Yes, I know, but I never waste an opportunity to use a Zeppelin song as a reference. I’m quite amazed but yesterday and today are the first times I’ve been really sick. I mean sick to the point where I cannot even get out of bed without burning all the energy that’s not fighting the sickness.
Getting this sick makes me aware of a few things that I guess I knew but wasn’t paying attention to all these months.
First, of course, was the fact that I realized just how much stuff I do every day and don’t even realize it any more. I mean, the daily routine that amazingly I seem to be getting used to following. I know this because having let the routine lapse for these two days alone has let the house turn into an absolute mess. The kitchen is filled with dishes. The floor is full of opened Christmas presents that hadn’t been played with during the holiday and the clothes have piled up onto the laundry basket like Mount Everest.
Before you all make the suggestions, yes, I tried to yell at the kids, tell them what needs done. The problem is they knew I didn’t have the energy or the fortitude to back up my threats. It was like being adrift on a leper ship. Two of the boys got sick, neither of them lasting more than a day. I’m on 2 1/2 days already and only now feeling human.
Second is the fact that Abbi, my oldest, is a godsend. Yes, I know I’ve been complaining about the lack of chores being done, but I’ve been reliant on her help to make sure that things get done. She entertained the other 3 kids while I slept. She got me the medicines I asked for and did a run to the store when I needed it. I managed to cook a batch of chili for dinner but ended up having her make the rice that we eat with it. Where the other three kids yelled and argued with each other Abbi worried and told me I was too run down and needed to rest.
The last thing, which I should think is obvious, is that I need to take better care of myself. Just the other day someone told me I needed to make sure I took some time for myself, though I don’t know when or how that will happen. But one thing I can take from that is the fact that I need to get in better shape and lost some more weight. If my body is in better shape my immune system will be in better shape as well.
This last one is probably the hardest thing I have to do. I have to make the time to exercise or get some time to work out but finding the time isn’t something I can foresee at the moment. It may wait until Spring, when the clocks go forward and there’s more daylight. I can jog or walk, but it’s not an easy thing for me. I prefer to have a destination. I have a bike that’s worth using, and my son has one from Santa so I may just go on family rides when the seasons change.
These are necessities. I have so little room for error these days that I have to look forward and see what’s coming. I cannot afford two days where I’m not even just sub-par. Otherwise the kids worry, like they did this last couple days. I have reached a point in life where hiding in bed for two days isn’t possible. Yet when I try to do the routine I get more worn down. Only through getting my body in order along with our lives will things end up on better track.
I’ve started, but like so many other things, I can’t afford to let up. It’s not just my life on the line anymore. I can’t afford to let those four kids down.
It’s a lot of philosophy from a bout with the flu, I know. Maybe I’m a little fever-addled but in the end, it’s all for the best. I can’t afford to let myself slide either. I can’t afford to be sick again, not a long time.
It’s amazing the things you realize when you least expect them.